Eye Exam: $200
Frames: $100
Lenses: $380
The knowledge that 1.71 refractive-index plastic lenses cost more than a contact exam and frames: priceless.

January marks the necessity to update my contacts for the yearly metamorphosis my eyes undergo. Apparently I’ve slipped two diopters since last year, confusing my eye doctor; people my age don’t have fluctuating vision and increasing myopia as a rule. So why did I mention my glasses, when everyone knows I clearly prefer contacts? Their intended purpose of backup vision when contacts are inappropriate or tired eyes prevail makes them indisposable. I’d been meaning to replace my glasses, as the current pair is either four or five years old and completely useless in all but the closest detail work. As expensive as $480 glasses may initially appear, they’ll likely garner similar longevity.

But the fact remains my vision worsened greatly since my previous exam. One thing I’ve noticed in my years is that different eye-doctors correct for astigmatism and myopia differently. One point of astigmatism generally counts for two diopters of myopia, and I’ve often witnessed this reaction to my eyes. The cause is mysterious but seemingly infinite: I appear to have two points of myopia and one of astigmatism that constantly vie for superiority. I’ll call it margin of error and proclaim victory at whichever measures ensure I emerge with 20/20 vision. So far, that’ll require new glasses being worn for two or three weeks to allow the topography of my cornea to revert to its normal state, some medication to clear up the papillary conjunctivitis caused by the contacts irritating my eyes over the years, and another eye exam. Fun!

I’ve also made an appointment for an MRI at the University of Chicago. Though my cardiology appointment isn’t until March, Dr. McNally mentioned she wanted a better synopsis of my heart’s functioning capacity and current morphology since the echocardiogram was mostly inconclusive. Many would envision claustrophobia or napping opportunity during an extended period enclosed in a long magnetic tube. I anticipate utter boredom. I’m incapable of napping, there’s no room to read, and electronic devices would likely be utterly destroyed, so my options are limited. Someone suggested having them play a CD over the internal speakers, so I’ll wrack my brains for a suitable choice from my rather esoteric collection.

My uber battery charger arrived today, which will assist powering my Nintendo Wii habit. No, I did not pay retail, and apparently the Amazon dealer has ended the $39.99 sale I encountered. Also accumulated today was a largish packet from MedicAlert containing a cheapie stainless-steel pendant, identification card, fridge magnet among other marketing accoutrements. I am now garbed in magical Medic Alerting Technology ™! As usual, hopefully I’ll never need the assistance these particular items provide.

Until Tomorrow

Body, Slightly Used, $5/OBO.

One thought on “Body, Slightly Used, $5/OBO.

  • Daaaaamn! $480 for glasses?! They had better last a long time. However, I’m not overly surprised at the cost. I always thought that decent glasses started at around $100. Umm…yay for your new MRI appointment. Good luck picking out a CD. As for your MedicAlert equipment…it’s good that you have it, and yes, hopefully you will never ever actually need it. Okay, I need sleep and to think of new ways to shock and disappoint my parents, so good night.

    Take care of yourself

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