February 05, 2010 The Thunderdome of Reading
It would seem that I read a lot more than I thought. My book pile was dwindling and I wondered how that was possible, since I had at least six or seven in the pile before the holidays. Well, as it would turn out, between the train rides and reading before bed, I consume more than my fair share of books. So, what did I read during January? In order:
Stephen King's Under the Dome
Mr. King has a disturbing knack for producing weighty tomes on occasion. This one tilts the scales around 1200 pages, and while some may disagree, I don't feel like it was dragging anywhere. In true King fashion, we seem to get a perfect storm of coincidences and unfortunate circumstances to wring every last drop of misfortune from the town he chooses to obliterate. The whole time, I was angrily shouting for a particular character's death because it was all his fault. King makes sure you know early, so you can spend a good majority of the book anticipating when he'll die, or his plans will go awry, or something, anything other than what actually happens.
This is clearly a nod back to King's earlier work as Bachman, and he admits as much in the book's introduction. It's one of the stories he started a long time ago, but never fleshed out until recently. If you've been staying away from his work because you think he sucks now, stop it! This is better than Duma Key, which itself was actually pretty engrossing.
Dan Simmons' Carrion Comfort
I'm a long-time fan of Simmons. The Hyperion Cantos, Summer of Night, and A Winter Haunting, are all some of my favorite books in their respective genres. Sure, The Terror was so boring it made my want to pry my eyes out with my bare hands, but we all make mistakes.
Carrion Comfort is Simmons' second book, which garnered him a Hugo. I tend toward scifi and horror, but for some reason, I thought much of his earlier work was a string of thrillers, much to my chagrin. As it stands, Carrion Comfort is a solid work. Here, vampires are real, but they control minds instead of drink blood. The implications are not quite as fully explored as I hoped, but it's an exceptionally layered novel and fully deserving of the several awards it won. That it was almost never published at all is a crime, and proves just how insipid publishers are, and just how competitive the book market really is.
Joel Shepherd's Crossover
Shepherd is a new author, but he's got something strong with his Cassandra Kresnov Series. It starts a little weak and the writing is awkward at times, but he's built an intriguing cast and provided a semi-believable backdrop for them to explore. It's difficult reading over all the UK English spellings, but apparently some of my favorite authors are European, so I have little choice. Either way, Shepherd explores the usual themes you'd encounter with a fully manufactured humanoid integrating into society and the implications therein. I won't really know the complete direction this goes until I read one or two more of the series, but it's a good start. Consider giving it a look.
Jeff Noon's Vurt
Vurt is... fucking weird. Seriously, what the hell is this? It's like A Scanner Darkly meets LSD. A bunch of kids get high on virtual reality so entwined with the world, it can alter reality itself. It's like reading someone attempting to chronicle a series of drug trips, and... it actually works. Vurt is excellent, enthralling even. Made-up words drive a breakneck pace through scenes imaginary and insane, yet I felt for the characters and wanted some tiny happiness for them, and that was even before their lives became truly difficult. I'll definitely need to pick up more of Noon's work.
Dan Simmons' Song of Kali
Ah yes. Simmons wrote one book to start his career, and it won a World Fantasy Award at a ceremony he barely managed to attend. That he did this and still had trouble finding a publisher should be a sobering wakeup call to every aspiring writer out there. As a first novel, it's very solid writing, and even in Calcutta, swarming with presence and full to bursting with human activity, he manages to make the characters and the reader feel isolated and wary. What should have been an uneventful trip to India to inverview a poet becomes something much more sinister, and Simmons peels away the human psyche as he attacks every weak spot we seem to have.
Kali is needlessly cruel. The seemingly nonsensical way she gets revenge for being thwarted is both imaginative and pointless, just as a Goddess might act to swat a pest. I spent the whole book hoping the characters would somehow escape India unscathed, knowing such a thing was impossible, but not really understanding the mechanism of their destruction until long after the last page turned. There are some scares, but this is mostly a psychological horror novel, and Simmons accomplishes through inference what most writers need to fully explain. It reminded me again why I love his writing.
Now, I know my writing is nowhere near the caliber of any of the authors here, with the possible exception of Mr. Shepherd. But it's something I can aspire to. But Dan's tale of woe in finding a publisher for Carrion Comfort tells me that there's too much competition in the writing world, and even good authors can get a bad break. So I'm taking an alternate route: digital publishing. I've published Rabbit Rue at Smashwords because for better or worse, electronic books are the future. As the technology necessarily improves, it's inevitable that more ebooks will continue to be sold. I plan on getting in early, and will try my best to be prolific. I'm still trying to figure out how to acquire an audience, but I'm sure it'll come with time. As long as someone reads and enjoys my stories, I'm content.
Until Tomorrow
February 04, 2010 Morons on the Internet: Hilarity Ensues
Well it turns out I found a couple forums discussing the same thing as my rant from yesterday with one major difference: the forum is apparently frequented by morons. Granted, these particular unabashed cretins are capable of utilizing a computer, but its clear these computers were manufactured by Fisher Price, and are likely caked in drool and feces. It's time to put the internet to its actual purpose! Do you know what that is? Porn? Perish the thought. Videos? Games? Facebook? Sorry Bub. The real purpose of the internet is to shamelessly taunt and belittle other people on the internet. Since this is me, and I pride myself on being unnecessarily mean-spirited for no apparent reason just for the entertainment value. Let's see just what my esteemed cohorts over at the Topix Forums are mindlessly babbling about, shall we?
Note: Names have been changed to protect the retarded, but they know who they are.
Concerned wrote:
Just a question, did you attend any of the informational meetings that were held in the community? You seem to be a liitle misinformed.
tea party wrote:
INFORMATIONAL ? ARE YOU KIDDING ! PROPGANDA AND HALF TRUTHS BY BLOTTED UNION GOVERMENT WORKERS
Holy fucking shit! You're right! Fuck the kids, those teachers are obviously conspiring to save their jobs in one of the lowest paying districts in the state! They—quite indisputably—enjoy waking up at 5:30 a.m. for morning classes they aren't paid for! Besides, everybody knows teachers spend most of their time picturing your children naked and imagining foolproof scenarios where they can molest them without getting caught! Why listen to these deranged malcontents at all?! In fact, what are we doing trusting our children to their care for several hours every day!? Are we insane? They're probably indoctrinating our children this very second to become socialist baby-rapists just like them! OH MY GOD, WHAT HAVE WE DONE!?
Jesus breakdancing Christ, you worthlessly paranoid fuck. Why don't you buy a cabin in Montana, stock it full of canned goods, and start digging a bomb shelter, already? Why not write a manifesto about how the third lowest taxes in the county are a communist plot to simultaneously mug you of valuables and corrupt your children? Quick! Go, before the government gets there!
average joe wrote:
this district has taken countless money from impact fees and taxes. for them too not see the need too put some of this money away for future use is reckless beyond words! i'm going to pay higher taxes for lack of forsight! i wish i could demand a raise from my boss everytime i screw up my future!
You apparently can't read, but I won't hold it against you. Your demonstrated disdain for education proves only that you dictated your forum entry to a homeless man whilst standing in a library, because you're incapable of comprehending ideas more complicated than "The dog ran fast." (OMG LIBRARIES COME FROM TAXES!) So I'll put this in terms even you can understand.
- Taxes third lowest in Will county: OGG MOST FRUGAL IN VILLAGE! OGG GOOD!
- The state cut $2M from the budget: VILLAGE TOOK OGG BONE! OGG ANGRY!
- Teachers and administration are already some of the lowest paid in Northern Illinois: OGG POOR. OGG SAD!
- Even after the referendum, [REDACTED] would be among the lowest taxed: OGG NOT GREEDY! OGG BEGGING!
- Regardless, district 159 is one of the top performing in the state: OGG SMART! OGG TEACH GOOD!
So of course! Let's punish one of the few frugal schools that turned to a referendum as a last resort, with utter disdain and contempt! How dare they save several million dollars over the years, and spend it in hopes funding will return before the supply is exhausted! Actually... no. You know what, Joe? You're right. Schools clearly failed you, or you would have better grammar than an expired jar of mayonnaise. I'm sure OGG's arguments were far too overwhelming for your over-stressed brain to absorb, so you've undoubtedly started watching Hee-Haw reruns instead. But be careful Joe, those folks is tee-vee actors, and everyone knows they're a bunch of pinko commies that think they're better than you.
Jane wrote:
Does anyone realize that there are approximately 140 homes in [REDACTED] that are vacant and forclosed on because of the economy. People cannot afford to live here anymore?? Does anyone also look around town at the amount of houses large and small that are currently for sale because people are trying to sell before being forclosed on?? Don't get me wrong, I supoprt the schools, but the amount of the referendum and timing to ask for it was way off. Remember this is not happening due to the people who voted against it but the State of Illinois who is failing all of our schools including Lincolnway High School District.
Holy fucking shit! Is that... proper grammar and punctuation!? Well... no, but it's some of the best I encountered while reading through that forum and trying not to pry my eyes out with a dull spatula. But we'll ignore that, since I'd hate to be accused of ignoring the "content" of her post. And, really it's too easy, because Jane was apparently living in a cave with OGG for the last two years, because she somehow missed the collapse of the housing market.
See, Jane... loan brokers started giving loans out like drugged candy to crack babies, and since more people could "afford" homes, that caused a false commodity and forced prices to rise far faster than inflation. This kept happening until prices were so inflated, nobody could afford them. But banks were smart, so they were selling these loans as packages to government backed Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac so they wouldn't be there when the loan defaulted. Through all this, AIG and its ilk were basically selling bets that this market would not collapse, though it certainly would. It was a rather impressive house of cards, and someone forgot to bring glue, so housing prices collapsed at the same time sales dried up. Now people owe twice as much as the house is worth, so they're walking away, causing further weakness in the market.
But oh, it doesn't stop there, Jane. During the rise of the housing market, people were noticing that the value of their homes was rising faster than they were paying the loan. That meant they were gaining equity at breakneck pace, and some wondered if they could spend that money. The smart ones sold the house and pocketed the difference. Most just opened up an equity line and used the house as an ATM, buying all sorts of consumer goods, vacations, and luxuries they wouldn't normally be able to afford. Now, what happens when housing prices stop going up? When consumers no longer have effectively infinite disposable income?
That's right, Jane! They stop buying things. Or they continue, but use credit cards instead. Starved of customers, retail stores and restaurants begin to suffer, and some declare bankruptcy. This starts a chain reaction that ripples through the economy and drives up unemployment across all sectors, which causes sales to decline even further. All this because people stopped seeing their houses as places to live, but "investments" that could produce fast cash. The banks facilitated this, but it's hardly completely their fault.
So no, Jane. The people are not losing their homes due to high taxes. The state and local governments are cutting back, actually. And cuts are warranted, but they, like everything, should be proportional. Cutting ten or twenty percent from District 159 would make sense, not fifty. When your budget goes from $3.8M to $1.9M, that difference needs to be made up somewhere. Since the state stopped paying, the local area needs to pick up the slack. That's what anti big-government people want, isn't it? More local control, less state and federal involvement? This school was doing the right thing, and they were punished for it, and may not recover at all.
So, congratulations. You contributed to hamstringing one of the top scoring, yet cheapest, elementary districts in the state. Yes, many districts have tons of overpaid administrators and could use some trimming, but for this particular set of schools in this particular situation, that's not the case. And did you know Jane, that even after the increase, the district would still be among the cheapest in the county, if not the state of Illinois? Ah, well. It was a nice community while it lasted. Enjoy sending your kids to New Lenox.
See what I'm dealing with, folks? I know people on the internet are retarded. It's a rule we all learn early in the game, if only to retain our own sanity. I've been doing it longer than most, and it's the one universal that never deviates. Even if you're capable of deciphering whatever some random fuck vomited onto your screen, you're at a loss as to what deranged brain is capable of producing such drivel, let alone ascribing veracity to it. Even the "smart" ones are about as thoughtful as a ferret hopped up on cocaine.
And I won't lie to you. I've been to the district 159 campus. To me, it looked like those buildings were constructed by the same contractors that build Best Buys and Costcos; huge warehouses with exposed steel supports and practically no finish. The classrooms were small, the lunchroom was oddly the central fixture for the building, and I could not escape the impression it was the cheapest thing they could acquire, short of a van down by the river. Staffed by some of the lowest paid teachers in the state, I'm amazed it does as well as the test-scores attest. But these are the "overspending tax-rich union cronies" [REDACTED] wants to punish.
There's idiocy; ignorance; and mind-splitting, mouth-dropping, contemptuously aggressive irrationality. Most of the forum I linked trends toward the latter, and never really improves. Which is why I refused to sign up with the forum and speak to these morons, because that would wrongly give credence to their senseless babbling. Besides, this is the internet, and we all know: debating on the internet is like the Special Olympics; even if you win, you're retarded. So I just make fun of these fine examples of upstanding citizens, because they're demonstrably good for little else.
Until Tomorrow
February 03, 2010 Don't need no edumacatin'
Note: Names have been changed to protect the retarded, but they know who they are.
People are nothing, if not hilarious.
A local school had a referendum on the ballot yesterday, the second of February, which was soundly defeated. Why was the district begging for cash? It might have something to do with the state cutting half their funding. Not ten, twenty, or even thirty percent, allowing for some measure of reorganization to preserve programs, half. The property taxes in the district's area are some of the lowest in the state, not having been raised since the 1970's, so they hoped the public would cut them a break just this once.
The public said Fuck You in no uncertain terms, and proves just how ignorant and selfish people really are, when all is said and done. The best part is that the district had money set aside from previous years of surplus, and have kept everything running partially on that surplus since last year, but decided against putting the referendum on the ballot then, thanks to the presidential election, which studies generally show is the time referendums are statistically likely to be defeated by voters uninterested in the issue. So, the district is doubly fucked. No money, and now, no surplus. Now major cuts are needed if the district wants to survive at all.
So let's see what the ass-slurping cock-mongers get for their Fuck You. Band? Gone. After-school clubs of every kind? Done. Over ten percent of the teaching staff? Don't let the door hit ya where the good lord split ya, bitches. All-day kindergarten? Those kids are too fucking young to learn fuck-all anyway. Besides, everyone knows that's just daycare. Class sizes? As high as your sister after that all-day gangbang; hey, she let you go first, so it's not a total loss.
There's probably more, but it's not like I took careful notes while I was suppressing my urge to kill. Now, I fully realize asking for money during a bad economy is probably going to be as successful as stopping your mom from slobbing my knob (God damn, I said stop, bitch!) and the district could have asked for money during better times to ensure they could weather a downturn. But they didn't. Maybe out of some misguided pride in their fiscal responsibility, or maybe it was that undoubtedly far-fetched scenario of the state cutting the budget in half that never would have occurred to them under any circumstances short of a fucking Zombie Apocalypse. Seriously, what the fuck, Illinois?
I know the state is experiencing a huge deficit. Those are usually handled by state-wide cuts across the board, not huge, eyeball-gouging swaths from some, and none from others. Part of the problem of course, was that the district's own fiscal responsibility made them a candidate for their own ass-rape. See, the state saw that taxes in the area were low, and that the school had a small surplus, so figured it could cut more. So there ya go, kids: spend every dime you have like you're the only hooker on a New Jersey shipwreck, because if you save any for a rainy day, they'll just call you a stuck-up bitch and fuck you harder.
Some of the parents even dismissed the whole issue, stating that they'd vote NO on the referendum, and instead, send their children to the local private school. That's the best part, really. It clearly illustrates the "I've got mine!" mentality that has so permeated American society as a whole. The whole fucking reason we even have public schools is because many could never afford private schooling. We decided long ago that an educated populace was a boon to civilization, that we'd rather have an educated workforce because the alternative was often a guy stabbing you for your wallet, and raping your wife because... well, why the fuck not? It's not like the poor SOB has anything to look forward to, what with no fancy book larnin' what keep him in a jerb, so he lives under an overpass because we cut those programs too. But, at least you have the lowest property taxes in the area, so you still have that on your side as you're bleeding out on the street.
It's also a great psychology experiment. So many people are self-absorbed douchebags, they project those very attributes on others. Many of the teachers who lost their jobs would gladly do so if it meant the children could retain some of the cut programs. Even some of the teachers who still have a job would rather be unemployed than see critical programs cut. Yet some parents, and even teachers will accuse anyone supporting the referendum as merely interested in protecting his or her job, that the only reason they care is because of a paycheck. Speak for yourself, you arrogant jizz-gargling chlamydia pustule.
"But I don't have kids!" they whine. Yeah? Well, unless you really were spawned from an act of succubus rape, you spent at least a year or two as a child, and more than likely, went to a public school. You also benefit from the trained monkeys it produces—since our class warfare almost guarantees public schooling is necessarily of lower quality—so pay up, you selfish ass-gobbler.
The most exasperating thing about this is of course, the seeming backlash in this country against all types of education, as if we now consider it some kind of elitism. "We ain't come from no monkeys!" No we didn't, you ignorant fuck! Due to species differentiation, we both diverged from a common root several million years ago. Besides, don't insult the fucking monkeys; they're likely glad they didn't come from you, either. "Oh, well you're just an overeducated snob!" What, because I paid attention in school instead of agonizing over the most aerodynamic spitball I could produce? Because I understand that superstitious bullshit like astrology is literally impossible considering the trillions of other galaxies which make up the universe, and supposing our piddly corner of a single galaxy any influence over human personality is patently ridiculous? Teach to the controversy? Really? Is alchemy still a valid alternative to chemistry, or is it just evolution that's "controversial?"
I've just about had it with this country. It's as if we espouse stupidity, and have as a consequence, demonized the educated as amoral malcontents. I'm actually starting to hope Idiocracy isn't a documentary, because it's almost hard to believe otherwise given the—albeit relatively circumstantial—evidence at hand. This one defeated referendum is hardly a microcosm illustrative of the country as a whole, but it is a terrible example of priorities in suburban Illinois. Considering Illinois is relatively liberal, which historically values such things as education, that's a sobering and terrifying consideration. Fuck you too, residents of [REDACTED], IL. You reap what you sow.
Until Tomorrow
January 07, 2010 Song: Cry of the Liger
Sung to "Eye of the Tiger". I also apologize profusely for this.
Glancin' up, back on its feet.
First it stares, then it pounces.
Through the distance, you can never retreat.
Just a man who'll be eaten alive!So many times, it happens too fast.
Its claws and teeth are both gory.
Don't try to run or it will save you for last.
You must fight, or he'll eat you alive.[Chorus]
It's the cry of the liger.
It's a beast made of fright.
For it is both a lion and a tiger.
And there's no known survivor,
who has lived through the night.
And the last thing you'll hear is the cry...
Of the Liger.Eats your face, just for the meat.
Hangin' 'round, lookin' hungry.
He'll track you down, 'cause your entrails are sweet.
It is futile to try and survive![Chorus]
Runs you down, ain't gonna stop.
You're in his territory.
Went the distance, 'cause he knew you would drop.
Just a man's vain attempt to survive![Chorus]
The cry of the liger.
December 14, 2009 Variations on a Theme
What exactly do you do, when you realize there's nothing seems interesting? That you don't want to meet anyone, because there's a limit to the elements that influence the human condition, and people are nothing if not predictable, instinctually driven automatons ultimately devoid of novelty. We're creatures of habit, of our environment, of parenting, of any multitude within a cavalcade of influences both imagined and concrete. Yet our psychology is exquisitely unencumbered with the confusion this might imply.
Shiny things. Punishment and reward cycles. Protectionism. Summary historical reaction mapping. Reproductive drive. Pack behavior. Memory impermanence as a protective mechanism from physical and mental missteps. Fight or flight, and any number of hormonally influenced reactive preservation elements. Every one of these and more, evolved during the haphazard survival of the human animal, all genuinely important, and unfortunately exceptionally limiting when we're a slave to them.
I'm not entirely certain whether or not I'm unique in this regard, but I perceive the world and everything in it as a mesh of patterns. The more of them I encounter, the more everything falls into place. It's not that magic is lost in this transaction, but that my interest suddenly wanes. I have a sad history of losing interest in almost anything where I attain any modicum of skill. It's as if I'm purely driven by curiosity and once that's sated in one area, I must move on. I've been, in no specific order, almost singularly driven by writing, drawing, video games, psychology, math, physics, computers, cooking, music, and so the list grows. I'm not a jack of all trades, because it's not the skill I'm after, but the understanding behind the activity itself, how it works, and possibly why. I file it away somewhere, and wander off in search of other novel mental stimulation.
But I've long since reached a point of diminishing returns. The truth is that several seemingly unrelated disciplines are inexorably intertwined, so much so, that I've lost interest in practically everything. The worst of this is that I find people, other human beings, the last vestige of infinite variation, tiresome. They're superstitious, ignorant, easily influenced, jealous, suspicious, overprotective, excitable, veritably overflowing with cognitive dissonance, all too willing to delude themselves to avoid facing a painful truth.
Need bifocals? No, I'm not old enough for that yet! Go to the dentist? My teeth are only bleeding... they'll be fine!. Only get a 3% raise in the face of a down economy? I deserve better than that! Strike! Oh my God, did you see what she's wearing? And, did you hear about Tiger Woods? It doesn't matter what I do... I have tenure! Liberals! Conservatives! Socialists! Ooooga-boooga! It doesn't matter that he's wrong! You can't risk offending him!
I know exactly why we do all these things, and sadly, that doesn't make it any better. We're idiots, and quite frankly, it sickens me that I'm part of such a delusional, self-important, gullible asshat of a species. Even when I'm not actively revolted by the staggeringly repugnant things we do to ourselves, I'm bored out of my skull when interacting with my fellow man. It's not that they don't have interesting things to say, but it always follows a theme. Just as a previously outlined, it's always something at least in some way, influenced by instinctual behavior. It'll be about a new acquisition, or perhaps a baby has been born, or a wedding, or a great new band, or maybe a new restaurant, or how about that new technological breakthrough, or maybe some obscure but ultimately tame philosophical insight, or how about that seasonably appropriate sports team? I know I'm supposed to identify with these things, and possibly offer my own flavor to the conversation, but why?
Why? There's billions of us, and for all the billions that have come before, we're following the same pattern as we have for millennia. I could interject no authentically insightful comment, offer no influential breakthrough a person would not discover on his own, or has not somehow been covered at least a hundred separate times by possibly a million other people throughout history. And even if I did, time would march on and render these things ultimately moot, and humanity would continue repeating its futile pattern, accomplishing little else but propagating itself while even the greatest philosophers fade into the annals of history as it marches toward the heat-death of the universe. I feel like a slightly more aware ant among a sea of other ants, and sense an oncoming foot.
I've long maintained Langston Hughes had it right, but the reality of what he meant becomes more horrible every day. Nobody loves a genius child, least of all himself.
Until Tomorrow
