Not sure how I forgot to post this, but last Friday, I went to local TLC Laser Eye Center and practically got laughed out of the office. Their multi-million dollar machinery couldn’t even diagnose my prescription because it was too high. You’d think if a company manufactured something worth several million dollars, they’d go for broke and design the thing to recognize some patently absurd level seen only in Mr. Magoo or possibly a blind mole rat.

Warning, this rant is brutal and not safe for 5-year-old girls. I recently saw this video on temperature, and I have to agree: temperature can suck a bowl of maggots swimming in herpes-infested pus scabs. Especially winter. Fuck you, winter. So far, this particular winter is about as endearing as a festering rat carcass cellphone-cozy. February has been a blistering barrage of snowstorm warnings, wind-chill advisories, and apparently deadly fucking tornadoes.

C:\POSTARTICLE.EXE Article Posting Engine 2.97.827 build 132875423 alpha 47 -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Enter article type. Enter ? for list. > rant Loading rant module... done. Enter rant type. Enter ? for list. > sarcastic Initializing sarcasm plugin... done. Select sarcasm level. Enter ? for list. > billionty WARNING! Setting 'billionty' is highly unstable! Continue? > yes Enter subject matter, 'FUCK' terminates: > Clinton > Bush > dynasty > hades > handbasket > FUCK Generating tokenizer.

And there are those that vanish, beneath the sundered skies. Who prey upon the witless, with malice in their eyes. Sit smoking in the landscape, a rolling wake of rage. Tumultuous with a sickness. beyond mere turn of age. This rhyming lilt of marching, doth shake the pebbled earth. Resplendent in the darkness, erasing his own birth. And through that eye of nothing, a glass burned through with none.

Bob: Wow, I was beginning to think you’d fallen off teh intarwebs. Shaun: Droll. Bob: Well, I certainly thought so. What, nothing to say for the last over a month? Shaun: … Bob: I’ll take that as a no. Shaun: Do you think this is healthy? Bob: What? Talking to yourself, or being so apathetic you can’t even bring yourself to write about anything? Shaun: There’s nothing to write! I played some video games, watched all of House… nothing exciting.