Be Safe, Citizen!

Here we see our government doing everything it can to stop terrorism. Boy, I bet those filthy vermin threatening our planes with Zippos are quaking in their boots.

Personally, I believe this doesn’t go far enough. For maximum safety, clothing should be banned, and body-cavity searches mandatory, for all mass-transit. Passengers should also be incapacitated to prevent possible physical violence, stuffed into sterilized Safety-Bags(tm) equipped with breathing apparatus, and inserted into Safety-Compartments(tm) in lieu of seats. This would also solve that pesky problem of passenger accommodation; sleeping passengers stacked like cord-wood increase profits!

Yeah! That’s the ticket!